The Awkwardness that is Starbucks

when will they get it right?..

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As you already know if you read my blog, I’m a Starbucks addict. Heck no am I afraid to admit it. But during my every encounter at this heavenly place, it seems something awkward always has to happen.

this is pretty much what every visit is like..

I wait in the long ass line, pretending to be on my phone but also angling my screen so that the snoopy girl behind me doesn’t see my ugly snapchats (or try to photobomb).

When it’s finally my then to order I still have to say “hold on” and decide my order because I was too preoccupied trying to look preoccupied while I was in line to think of my order. After about 50 seconds of thinking, I still order my Skinny Vanilla Latte that I’ve order for the past 6 years..

Next is time for the dooming question. “What name can I put on the cup?” “Mikah.” “How do you spell that?” “It really doesn’t matter” (sometimes I spell it for them anyway, but I like to see how it’ll turn out now).

Disclaimer: even when I spell my name out and literally pronounce it for them, it still comes up on the counter “mika” “mike” “mila” “mikala” and my latest favorite, “miki.” Oh and getting the person to pronounce it is worse than brushing my dogs teeth.

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Then it’s time to pay and even though I have way over the $4.33 it is to buy my drink, I still have anxiety over the fact that my card could get declined (it happened sometime back in 2004 and I’ve never gotten over it). When my card goes through I can wipe the upper lip sweat off..

It’s time to walk up to the counter and there is usually about 5 other people there. Usually I pretend to be on my phone again, or uselessly scroll through my Instagram feed. Well the awkwardest part is if you didn’t hear them call out the drink up there (WHY DONT THEY JUST CALL NAMES SINCE THEY ASKED FOR IT AND THE SPELLING), you have to awkwardly turn the cup to see what kind it is.. I usually stand about 4 feet back and arch forward and use as little fingers as possible in case it’s not my drink and the Bellevue b*tch (for lack of better words) behind me yells and says I tainted her cup and got germs on it by turning it for 3 seconds.

the awkwardness is over when I get to leave.

XORelatable

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